Driving Defensively and Traffic Etiquette Guide

Defensive driving, is understanding that other drivers might not be paying attention or they could make mistakes and engage in aggressive driving that , result in crashes. In avoiding accidents, you have to be prepared to handle the other drivers’ mistakes and bad habits, as well as keeping aware of your own driving and keeping control of your own vehicle. Whether you are a Non-Experienced driver or been driving for decades, one can be uncomfortable or even get too comfortable about driving. Yet, we never loose the need to be cautious and mindful when behind-the-wheel.

Here are some Driving tips on being cautious, courteous and avoiding accidents. I cover some basic and some not-so-basic tips, but feel free to comment and add whatever else you may want to mention. Share this page and pass it along to anyone you feel may need or could use this information.

When driving, we are always susceptible to the actions of other drivers. The biggest error is trusting other drivers to be careful on the roads. Scenario’s and circumstances are ever-changing, each time we get out on the road. That’s what makes each time on the road so unpredictable. The biggest factors that will keep you safely driving on the road is being alert and aware (watching and (keeping an eye on reading the road) and not to be in a rush and speeding (give yourself plenty of time to get to your destination). Knowing ahead of time where exactly you are going, which route to take and keeping enough space between you and the car in front of you helps tremendously!!

Driving is a Privilege, be courteous to other drivers, take consideration that we are all human and can get into situations. We may be in different lanes, but we are here to share the road and help each other while on it! Just keep alert and aware and don’t jump into becoming upset at other drivers.

Driving is dangerous enough on the roads, one must watch for or stop habits of being a Distracted Driver (texting or in someway not paying attention to the roads) and other risky behaviors are being a Jumper (out-of nowhere, without warning, pulls in front of another vehicles ) or a Weaver (goes from one lane to another) and Speeders (driving in a hurry or as if they are on a racetrack game).

Some basic aspects of Defensive Driving are:

Keep a Safe Distance between your vehicle and the vehicle in front of you. Allowing reaction time and reduce your risk of colliding into cars in front of you or other cars. In bad weather, always keep a safe distance between other cars. Also, keep your eyes moving, look around, especially on long drives so you don’t go into a trance. Keep Alert!

Having Visibility when you need to change your lanes, not only using your mirrors to check for oncoming cars, but checking blind spots to make sure another car isn’t approaching beside you (that may be hidden from sight). Communicate with other drivers to get into another lane. Also be careful of driving in another drivers’ blind spot, to help them avoid crashing into you.

Always use Proper Communication to make sure other cars can see you and knows what you are doing or needing, by using your turn signals to communicate your intent, to merge, change lanes or etc. Also use hand signals to other drivers for assistance if need be, to get over into another lane or to let another driver know of something (maybe they forgot their gas cap or their tire looks flat). Have respect for other drivers when they signal and allow them to turn, change lanes and merge safely.

Before You leave and start driving your car, always check the weather and the time you are leaving to go out on roads, there are time-frames (during the day and late afternoon), that are called rush-hours, where a lot of vehicles will be on the road. Often, just leaving a little bit earlier before rush-hour times or leaving a little bit later, when rush-hour is just getting over (commonly 4:00pm-6:30pm), this can be so much safer. Specific Holidays can also cause the roads to be full of traffic and certain areas, such as state or city parks or campgrounds etc. Busy roads filled with traffic are most hectic and dangerous.

Before driving, (even if you are already in your car and ready to go), first check the best route to where you are heading, look over the map (whether the map is on your phone or physical one), to fully see exactly where you are heading (use the written route on your phone map as well, which can give you a read-out of the whole route) sometimes there’s even a better route than one the GPS suggests, especially if you can identify that on the map or you’re familiar with the area. You should always have a pen, a pad or paper to write on, in your car just in case you need to write a route or something down.

Reading the roads, is being aware of what’s happening in the road ahead of you and all around you. Be aware of where you would go in case you had to pull over and get out of the way of other cars or if something is in the road and you may have to get around it. Keep alert and watch what other cars could be doing, some cars may suddenly put on their brakes or stop to pick-up someone, there could be a car broken down or an accident . You may need to go around an approaching area, get into another lane over or get off that road and take another route. This is way no one should be looking at their phone while driving on the road, WATCH THE ROAD!!

Other common driving tips:

Speeding can kill and is harmful to everyone on the road. Speeding is one of the major causes of road accidents. There’s a reason for speed limits and to obey them for a reason, it will save lives. Speed limits vary on highways, it is essential to make sure you’re traveling within the posted speed limit. Slower speed limits are through roads of neighborhoods, stores, where people congregate or where wildlife tend to be crossing. Remember to adjust speed slower, when also driving through adverse weather conditions like rain and snow, as well as in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

Move into the lane you need to make your turn-off in non-highway road or to exit off highway, ahead of time. Don’t wait too long or at the last minute panic to get over into the lane you need to.. Use you signals and gradually get over and into the lane you will be taking your turn off or exiting the highway and doing this will give you plenty of time to get over to turn off (even if you have to end up being behind someone that’s going slower, as you approach your turn of , it’s better than trying to rush past cars to try and get over). If for any reason you miss your exit, don’t panic, jut go to the next one and turn off there.

Remember to put your lights on when it’s starting to get dark. You can also signal others by using your lights (turn them on and off at another car to remind them to turn on their lights, if they had not and it’s getting dark). Another common time drivers use the blinking of headlights; is when communicating to another person in a vehicle that is trying to get into the lane you are in and you are telling them, you acknowledge them and it is okay to come into the lane in front of you or that it is okay to go, in other instances.

Don’t assume the car waiting at the light in front is going to take off when the light turns green. Keep a bit of a distance, just in case they don’t go or if they hesitate, that way you won’t collide into them . Just because the car in front of you indicates it’s going to be turning right, does not mean that they will actually turn right. Unless you can physically see the vehicle turning, do not presume. Also, drivers are sometimes unaware their indicators are on.

Even when you have the green-light to go through an intersection, always make sure to take a look first, don’t automatically go, there might be a car still coming through the light and it could cause an accident.

Use Seat belts, they are your best self-defense against a vehicle crash and they can help keep you secure and safe, inside your car. Not putting your seat belt on is putting you at risk, without it on, it can’t save you. With them on, it can not only lesson injuries, but will save lives.

Don’t go into a vehicle to Drive if you are upset, have been drinking alcoholic beverages, taken drugs or anything that can alter your judgment. Even an over-the-counter flu medication can impair your judgment and increase your response time. All of these can make a person impaired and lose the capability to function, even when a person thinks it won’t and this risks getting into an accident. In addition to this, persons driving under the influence can be made to pay a massive fine, even end up going to jail and having their license suspended. Protect yourself and fellow drivers, by avoiding altering your ability to drive and if tired or under the influence of anything that could impair you, get someone else to drive you, please just stay away from behind the wheel.

• If your tires suddenly blow out: Do not slam on the brakes. Take a deep breath and don’t panic. Hold steering wheel and gain control over yourself and the vehicle, step off the gas pedal slowly. gently apply the brakes. Do your best to keep the vehicle going straight, Once your speed drops below 30 mph, gently step on the breaks. When you’ve slowed down to a safe speed, 20 mph or so, you can turn the steering wheel slowly to guide your vehicle off the road. When you are safely out of traffic, take another deep breath and call for help.

More Driving, courteous and cautious tips :

You are ALLOWED to do whatever you have to, TO AVOID an accident. Even if you have to miss your exit, so miss it and go to the next one and if you have to veer off the highway unto the shoulder pavement of the road, then do so, (just don’t ever get out of your vehicle and be standing on the side of the road or shoulder side of traffic) and keep away from traffic side of road. If a vehicle in front of you stops short and you have to quickly veer off to the side of road or into a parking lot or such, than do so or if you can, safely go into another lane. If a vehicles coming head on at you then, Brake, look for room to safely go into and get out of the way!

If you do have to drive off the road, to keep or get you out of harms way to avoid any accident, you will have to make a quick decision, especially if you are on the edge of a steep drop and what might look like a nice soft exit, as a grassy ditch could actually have a hidden drop and culvert. Slow down, keep control of your car, as will get the most braking power on a road rather than driving on the verge where grass or gravel, as they will not offer as much friction. If you have no other option, but to hit something to slow you down or avoid hitting another car, think to choose something softer!! Look and choose a large bushes and shrubs to take impact and slow you down more gently, help direct vehicle back into the road. Instead of a stiff tree(s) or hard object (which will do more damage to you and your car). There could be guard to hit in case there is no other better option and hit it on an angle or sideways as they are made to help the vehicle do a sliding to stop. In having no other choice, but to run into or hit something, try not to panic, think and choose wisely. It may damage your vehicle and hurt you some, but you may avoid a worse accident and it will save lives. .Regardless, steer away from EVER hitting anything HEAD-ON-STRAIGHT with your vehicle, go to steer sideways or at an angle.

• Remember, If ever you are going to hit or run into something steer sideways before making impact and hitting something will cause the airbags to go off, so taking your hands off the steering wheel at the last minute, before the impact will help prevent broken wrists and powder burns on your arms. If your arms are crossed when the airbag goes off, the airbag will hit your forearms while you are gripping the steering wheel. This can easily break your wrist. Your arm will be flung backwards into your face which can break your nose and knock out teeth, as well as break your forearm.

When Feeling Unsafe, Unsure, need to text safely , JUST PULL OVER!! Whenever, you encounter any situation that may interfere in anyway, with your ability to keep your focus upon the road; NEVER PUT YOURSELF in a risky circumstance because on the road, seconds count. If another driver is angry or has road rage, don’t engage in it or even look at them, keep eyes on road and let them pass or just keep away from them and safely drive on.

When traveling on the highway always Read the road ahead . If cars are coming into or merging onto the highway from an exit, look to see the adjacent lane that you can move over to (if you can), so the cars can merge onto the highway and you can avoid panic or accidents and then you can change back into you lane after .

When approaching unto or merging into the highway if there’s ever a big truck coming past in traffic within a short distance away, let the truck pass then get unto the highway. It takes a lot to slow a big truck down . Don’t ever try and get in front of a big truck, unless you have plenty of room and time to speed up way ahead of the oncoming truck. Trucks and big rigs carrying things need more warning and time to slowdown. Be courteous to truck drivers and big rigs. It is very difficult for them to maneuver around other cars in traffic and extremely difficult to stop. Let trucks just get on their way down the road and pass on. Best to just get into and use the next lane over instead, to avoid ever needing to pass a truck. When on the highway, if there happens to be a big truck (or any vehicle) going a bit slower in front of you, if in the right lane and you either are going to get off an exit to the right, just wait and get off your exist. If in the right lane and there is an immediate need to pass a big truck (or any vehicle) safely move into the middle lane, gradually speed-up and get several car lengths ahead of the truck, make sure you have your turn signal on to let the trucker (or person in any vehicle) know you are needing to pass and then pass them safely into the lane. If in the middle behind a big truck and need to pass them, get into the far left (fast lane) trucks are usually not allowed in fast lane) and same applies; get several car lengths ahead of the truck (or any vehicle), make sure you have your turn signal on to let the trucker (or person in any vehicle) know you are needing to pass and then pass them safely into the lane. Sometimes you may be behind a slower truck or vehicle and they are in the exit lane and you need to get off the exit approaching, just lower your speed, be patient and get off to your exit. PATIENTS PAYS OFF ON THE ROAD and just keep out of the way of trucks and big rigs !!

“Look Twice, Save a Life”, Keep a lookout for motorcyclist, whether you’re on the highway or neighborhood street. Be aware of motorcyclists and let them be aware of you. Give motorcyclist room to maneuver. Let the motorcyclist be aware you are going to change lanes, by giving enough time ahead, using your turn signal and when passing, make sure you have lengths ahead of the motorcycle before you pass and then return to your lane. Often using hand signals out your window for motorcyclist to see, also can help.

When driving through an intersection or anywhere you see pedestrians, Don’t assume they will see you coming and that they will stop, they may get distracted or be looking at their phones, make sure to slow down (use your horn, if need be to let them know you are approaching). Use eye contact or hand gestures (to go) in letting the Pedestrians know they can safely cross to other side or cross, being aware of each other’s intent. When approaching an area like a mall, parking lot, movie theater, convenient store, neighborhood or anywhere there is or could be people, always drive in there with a very slow speed, never chance going fast even if you’re in a hurry, those minutes can wait because it’s crucial in saving lives.

NEVER-EVER-BACK-UP IN A HURRY or back out fast, always go slowly backing out of anywhere, Check all sides of vehicle several times, people, children and animals can pop out at any minute and not seen coming around cars. You never know when a child or animal could break free and run into the road or pass the back of your car. Take a breath, Stop the Rushing!

• When coming back to your parked car or while still in your vehicle and a car next to you is backing out, getting ready to back out or coming into the space next to you, wait until they fully back out or pull in, to get in or out of your vehicle.

When there’s a hold up in traffic and there’s several cars trying to get into traffic where you had stopped at, let one car in as you go and then the next person can let the next car in and so on or if a total traffic jam, an accident and traffic is stopped or it turns into one lane (before reaching the area police controlled) the courteous thing to do, as each car goes, is to let ‘one’ car in . Another words, for the traffic to move faster and more fair, it shouldn’t be everybody passing cars up while everyone’s going ahead and everyone trying to get ahead of each other. Work together in a traffic jam, accident or such. It will move things along more quickly..

Keep your vehicle maintenance and inspections up to date. Not only will this prevent sudden stalls, but to avoid vehicle failure by checking tires, car lights, brakes and engines regularly. Make sure you have a first aid kit in the car and have sufficient insurance coverage to protect you, if you are involved in an accident.

Your safety is your responsibility, the less you assume, the safer you will be when getting behind the wheel.

Any activity that diverts your attention from driving– whether it’s texting or talking on your phone, eating, drinking, talking to fellow passengers or children in your car, fiddling with the music or navigation system, loud music playing in your vehicle, vehicle mis-function or being tired or under the influence of some substance… THESE ARE DISTRACTIONS !!!

Commit to driving defensively and use common sense safety rules and tips, to protect yourself and others from mishaps that can happen on the roads.

There are certified defensive driving course to learn about more safe driving practices in detail.

If anyone has any other tip or rule to share, leave the comment below.

Safety First and safe traveling on the roads, out there to All!!

C .Star. V

Recycling, It’s Honorable!

Recycle, Reuse, Rescue, Reduce

Recycling is still very important because most trash is not trash at all. We must keep realizing a very large percentage of our waste materials, items and things that we may not think can be recycled and repurposed actually can. This is monumental in reducing the waste, the pollution problem and saving lives.

I have recycled and repurposed alot over the years. I learned there’s a lot more we can do then we think.

• I recycle plastic baggies in all sizes, as long as it had not been previously used for anything with raw animal meat or something with a strong pungent odor ; such as an onion or garlic . I clean them with a bottle brush, warm water and soap, rinse well, shake excess water out, clean rag or paper towel to wipe dry and then air over a water bottle or such and reuse again. At least a couple more times!

• I recycle Glass or (some) Plastic Jars, from products that I buy from drinks, coffee, sauces or jellies and such. I will put them in a pot of water and soak off the labels. Then scrub the excess glue off (if need be), with some steel wool or some lighter fluid on a cotton pad and re-clean them. You wouldn’t believe the lovely glass jars that you can reuse to put other items or foods in or use as drinking glasses (That way if one breaks, it’s no biggie and not to risk using and breaking any of my good drinking glasses), saved me in those years of raising teens.

• As we were filling up our garbage can to the brim before the regular pick up days. Then found out from my local county recycling, that they took a lot more items, than I originally thought. So, we don’t have to take garbage out to our regular garbage can but every couple of days or more, it had . really cut down on the garbage especially if we empty food stuff (not seeds or pits) down the sink garbage disposals as well! Recycling has become more beneficial and a little more fun! I even put a smaller makeshift recycling bin at the corner of our counter in the kitchen it was a decorative bin and I lined it with a plastic bag and used it for daily recycling. Then, I would just bring the plastic bag to the big recycling garbage can (in the garage) dump it out and throw away the plastic garbage bag in regular garbage unfortunately, those weren’t recyclable. Oh how I wish they were!!

• Over the years, I have furnished my homes with items from thrift stores and kept recycling them. I also have pets that I have adopted and rescued from shelters and even from off the street (that no one claimed after advertising). Renewing a life..

There is much of garbage of bottles, plastic, paper, boxes, glass and aluminum (cans) that can be used again or put into recycling bins and then there is recycled (repurposed) household items, clothes, furniture, sporting goods, hobby materials and more. There are even animals that are rescued from shelters and given new homes, new lives and some are even trained to help wounded soldiers or people with needs and conditions. There are thrift stores and goodwill stores, that we can buy things from that were donated and used again, we also can donate to these and to animal shelters as well. So, there is a fair share of ways we all should be recycling; in reusing, repurposing, rescuing, and reducing all kinds of issues around the world, in our land, waterways, homes, lives and nature .

As, recycling is much more than a way to reduce the amount of trash that ends up in landfills, it is a proven method of reclaiming valuable items, materials and even lives.. What we discard can be recycled and utilized into new products or new usage. Whether it’s paper, plastic, metals, glass, aluminum, e-waste or a life from a rescue shelter or off street; they are all , far from worthless.

In recycling our waste products, it also helps us to reduce the need to use natural resources and fossil fuels, among many other benefits globally. As the recycling of organics, such as Composting, (this practice has been around for thousands of years) and It is one of the most efficient forms of recycling in use today; relying on a purely natural processes to breakdown waste which is then used as compost or fertilizer.

Yet, we know all of this, so why wouldn’t everyone doing their part in recycling?

I suppose, it is all in the way we think about our trash, garbage, our waste and the lives of others, as well as other living things; such as plants, animals and nature.

It is in what, we are throwing out, can’t use or don’t want anymore and we need to see through the idea that it is just all being garbage or useless, as it could be a much needed item or another way of being a valuable resource.

Hey! Please Recycle, Reuse, Reduce and Rescue Away!!

Our attitudes about our waste consumption and recycling must continue to change and this goes for all individuals, as well as in big and small companies.

What are ways that you have recycled?

C .Star. V

Downsizing to Uncluttering

I have had to unclutter and downsize many-a-times (lots of stuff, lots of children, big family, sentimental collector) and as anyone that has gone through this process can tell you, it is not an easy task. Yet, if you simply start with uncluttering, then cleaning, then rearranging and begin there, it may make the chore a little easier.

Now, uncluttering takes a bit of organizing in itself and ultimately some of the goals could be ; to actually know what you have, to know where your stuff is or locate all your stuff, to save you time and money from having to acquire or purchase more things that you already have, also to free up space in your home (and yourself) and to get rid of unwanted, unused, unneeded, broken, and otherwise useless stuff (even if they are liked by you) as things take up space and possibly restricting your freedoms.

We can often make the mistake in feeling as though, if we don’t have all of our stuff, not enough stuff or able to get more stuff, that we are not complete or not finished, but “The little kettle can boil the water just as good as the big kettle, yet the little kettle can fit in more places”. After or even during this process, many feel by “Downsizing and uncluttering often creates an upsize in their lifestyle, their potential, their freedom and their mobility”!

So, we will find that by re-organizing our things, we realize just how much we have and may not really need. Then, being faced with deciding what to keep around and what not to. The next decision is whether to keep the excess of things and where to put or store them. Some people choose a closet or room in their home (if large enough), others use a storage facility to store their excess and additional items. Often, we just need to get rid of a lot of stuff and that can be the most difficult (which has many putting off this process) and even though there are plenty of people with suggestions on how to figure out and decide what to keep and what to get rid of (and many good suggestions), honestly; it will all come down to your own needs and your own decision.

Uncluttering can be done once a week, everyday, a little bit here and there or every month or so. It just depends on each individual, as some people have began making a habit or routine of uncluttering their life and make efforts to keep it uncluttered (often by not buying more and more stuff) as less buying means less spending on things you don’t really need and being able to save to do or have more of what you really need or want.

Some of us, begin uncluttering because we are attempting to sell our home and must begin the process (not only to help in reducing the chore of packing later, but also to unclutter and clean-up all around for better pictures of the home). There can be a variety or reasons.

One of the best ways I have found, to help me organize everything and keep it that way; is to place anything and everything in its own spot or which I like to call, “its own home”. In other words, if I have or find around my residence things such as pencils, pens, sharpener, paper clips, scotch tape or such, these would all go in a desk or in an office area (a drawer in the kitchen may also have a few of these items for quick finding and use), but basically the bulk of different types of things collected or that I have, I organize them within their own place.

All Holiday decor, can be separated by holiday and put into plastic bins and can be put in a storage area, attic or storage facility for next use. As you find things or pick up things, take a moment and put it back into its ‘home area’ and so on and so on..(that way, when you may be looking for something or wanting something you’ll know where to find it). . It’ll also save you time later, if you put things you find (or come across each day or so) in a ‘catchall basket’ (big and small one) or in a specific area and then put it all away when or as you can…Then of course, sometimes you won’t have time or (you may find or collect something and you might not be home) to put the item back in the right place, you may have to hold onto it (put it in a bag or something) until you can get it into its proper place.

Often when we move from one resident to another, there seems to always be that daunting chore of going through all of our things (once again) deciding what we’re going to take, what we’re not, what is trash, what we could sell, may give to family members and friends or donate. Of course if you have been downsizing or uncluttering here and there, it will be a lot easier upon you. Yet, it’s one chore that never seems to get easier, no many how many times we do it and it never fails, no matter how much we can organize and unclutter we never seem to realize how much stuff we have or have collected.

Make the time to take time and start going through the things you have and have collected. You may find some-things you had forgotten you had and could use right now. You are living your life right now, so why not choose to use or do something with them right now? After all, you have wanted, collected and kept them for a reason! Choose to use them or if need to save something (as items kept to be given to family or friends), then give them as a gifts. You possibly could sell some things and you can always donate them; as someone else may really want it or have use for it (they may not have been able to ever acquire some-things) and that would make them smile or make their day to find an item of need or want. If you have ever went thrift shopping you’d know what I mean..

I have other tips and tricks on coping with the process of downsizing and uncluttering that I will post later, but for now I recall a saying that suggested we stop waiting to use and enjoy the things we have…

So yeah, Start downsizing to upsize your life and while you are at it, Go Ahead…Use the good-stuff and enjoy them now, there.. I gave you permission!

C .Star. V

Really No Good or Bad

Some of my past posts have been about choices, the wrongs, rights, goods and bad’s and well, morally or lawfully ; yes there is a wrong and a right..

However, basically there is no good or bad, when it involves our choices, but only choices we will deal with. You see, when we choose things and it put us in paths of being around, involved in/with or doing things and if it ends up being a bad thing (even ingesting wrong things), then we just are are dealing with what we have chosen..

If things begin to really go haywire, it’s not that we have to accept our choices and drown in our mistakes..we can right the wrongs.. Unfortunately, this may be easier said than done. However the first step is to realize our wrongdoings or the wrongdoings of others and forgive ourselves and others. Then, coming to an understanding of why we may have made that choice in the first place and it’s OK if we might’ve made a wrong decision or wrong choice and it may be possible to be corrected or have things be turned around.

However, sometimes it’s just not right to continue on with those choices because in some instances, trying to make things right is not always going to be right or work-out the way you want, (unless being forgiven or an apology, is all that is needed). For the times where things just won’t be turned around .. the key here is realizing for starters; is it morally or lawfully right or wrong and what makes it so..and why it will or will not be turned around into something good. Which, this now will turn into another choice-often called ‘a decision’ and these types of choices are usually made from what efforts we are willing to put forth from there.

Yet, it isn’t always right to try to keep in a wrong situation, trying to make it right either, it just depends (on what it actually is) and before making a major decision, we should reach out and talk about it (to those who really care about us or get professional opinion or advice) because sometimes, it’s just learning how to cope or make a better choice and what we should and should not do or we may have to just forgive ourselves and any others involved and move on from it and cope with it the best we can.

C .Star. V

The “Right” Flow ?

One major lesson that I’ve learned in life is when things are right (or shall I say, when there’s a positive energy flow) it seems to feel right and everything flows. There may be ups, downs and struggles, but they may just be in the course of getting through or they are usually figured out and there’s a pleasant outcome.. ..but when things are wrong they are just that.. wrong..

Now I’m not speaking here about morally right or morally wrong because we should all find that easy to recognize, (but it could apply to those). I’m speaking in terms of basic daily living experiences and situations. For, as we all make efforts in our lives, we could be using our energy on the wrong things, in the wrong way. This is not always easy to recognize because often we just pursue something we want, no matter if whether the signs are there or not. Why do we do this?

Well, because we can..We all, have a free-will to do so..(and of course, if we react upon “Emotion, instead of Logic”).

Let’s not get this confused, with the difficulties and persistence, while pursuing an education, getting help, counseling or persevering through, to achieve something..As the outcomes from our efforts are good. Even becoming employed in a new position or job may feel challenging or daunting. However, often it is just until the duties of the job are learned that it flows better, but trying to choose the right or wrong type of job to begin with can be an issue. Yet, employment can be compared to educating oneself because there is always a benefit in learning something at the end of the takeaway.

Many people give up on learning something or working on something because they start to spend their efforts and then it may feel wrong because it is a bit difficult or too much effort. That can also be true, when people are trying to eat healthier or lose weight .. the key here is to realize the end results.

Yet, there’s another right and wrong situation, which many have found to be upsetting, it is when we (or someone we know) gets involved with others that turns out to be wrong and not going in a good direction. Now getting into the wrong relationships with others (whether just friendships or intimate ones) or just following a path, a direction or social gathering, that could have a bad or have repeatedly bad outcomes, these all can be a bit tricky to deal with.

Sadly, in these situations we take upon the responsibility of making efforts and spending our energy upon something, even if it might not be the best choice. Then we often feel very obligated and committed because we put so much effort in already. Then it can be very difficult to steer away from it or try to change it .. this is where we have to make a decision upon the worth of the situation and the parallel of the intentions of ourselves and of what we are putting the efforts into..

When it comes to relationships, it will also depend on the other person and how they behave and if they are able to improve or take steps in working to correct the wrongs..

The key here is recognizing what the benefits are in being in this relationship  or situation and what kind of repeated unfavorable behavior is being coped with..

Sometimes I hear people say that things were once wrong , but it turned out right and that could be so, depending on what the issues and behaviors were in the first place and what efforts were made. So, things may end up good and turned around for the better , but that’s a whole other story.. For now being more selective with our choices and along with, not getting into a serious or permanent relationship without recognizing what the end results of our live could be for ourselves (and for others) ; as we could end-up dealing with a situation that may turn out wrong.

So, a way to recognize the flow of right from wrong is to consider what the end results could be, what total efforts are being made and the intent to begin with.. Most importantly, don’t make choices, upon emotions or wants. Think first what the outcomes may be and not just for yourself, but for others around you, (such as your family, friends, children and even your pet) all of these will be effected as well.

C .Star. V

Out of Under a Grey Cloud

As the Choices we make will be bring us on different paths in our life, some will bring us into the light of positive outcomes and some may end-up leading us into the dark. While in this process (of our thoughts and intuitions of making choices and decisions), we often hear others express to us; that we may use our heart, head or gut when making choices and decisions.

However, most of it will depend upon our intent and purpose for choosing, but in doing so it all goes back to what we are making our choice or decision upon and how we will carry it out, deal with it and how we will allow it to relate to us.

Many-a-times, we then spend our lives trying to make decisions in changing or correcting them and this can have us feeling overwhelmed. Our lives can seem to become all-encompassing and trying constantly, to get out from under a grey cloud. Especially, when we have chaos, confusion, disappointment, defeat, turmoil, unhappiness or stress that sets-in and we often use our energies up; just trying to correct or change things. All this begins to create an imbalance.

In this imbalanced state can lead into being a not so good-thing. Since, living day-to-day is a multifaceted act and trying continuously to get past our troubles (that have already been created), can cause our perceptions of things begin to shift and this often creates even more chaos, fear an imbalance.

All of this is governed by our will (free-will), which creates a force of energy that becomes an unstoppable action, which produces results. Either way, the result is a force that could allow us to attain our goals, our deepest desires or to just choose what we are going to wear or eat on a daily basis or choosing things we may regret.

As humans, we often can be very stubborn, arrogant and persistent upon thinking, we know more than anyone else about what’s best for ourselves and therefore we do everything we can to try to force our-will into existence. Yet, when we are not on the right track and don’t find the sufficient way to balance the energies out, the universe will be right there to balance it all out for us ( one example, is karma).

Most of us will just ignore this fact, which is why most people struggle in/with life so much. “Meanwhile, we can get so busy trying to live a life we think we want, instead of being responsible for the one we already have chosen”. Yet, whatever it is that has or has not worked out for us, we must realize, all of us have been given a task here on earth and we could be creating additional chores that need to be finished, all in order to keep us balanced. If it has not had the outcomes the way we wanted, it may never unless we take steps to change our attitudes in what we are doing and in what we are having to do to change it and finish our tasks.

This way, not to be destined to what we have chosen insufficiently. In order to do this and steer ourselves out of the darkness, we need to only see that all of us, must keep a balance (of Physical and Spiritual) and need to take positive actions in order to move past our past, away from the negative and direct ourselves accordingly. Some of the best forms of this positive action (or energy) comes from, forgiveness, random acts of kindness, better judgment and educating oneself. So to be creating a force more powerful than you can imagine.

C .Star. V

Good vs Bad Choices

How are we really supposed to decipher between good and bad choices? Besides the obvious of knowing right from wrong and of what we have been taught or witnessed out of outcomes and observations. We can also use the 10 commandments as a set of 10 good ‘common sense rules’ and we can use our own senses. Some people call it using our heads, hearts or gut feelings. Others may call it being mindful or being aware. It doesn’t matter what we call it, but using it properly when we need to, is what counts.

At one time or another, we envision how we want things in our life to be or how we imagine them, in our own minds to be. I say imagine because often we have an unrealistic perception of what it is or how things really need to be. Even in the efforts it takes, in order to have what it is that we desire or want in our lives. This can disappoint, frustrate and cause chaos in many of our lives. How many times, do we want something, such as, a relationship, marriage, a pet, raising children, a certain job or lifestyle or even just good health, but our lives don’t seem to turn out how we envisioned or imagined it to be? We hear of many people, children and pets abused, neglected and others stricken with illnesses and diseased.

It seems as though our society rushes to make choices or decisions without really understanding, preparing or realizing the whole picture. Many people make choices because of what others do or what others say to do, or what they feel they should do. Once a choice is made, it is often too late to undo it. However, there really isn’t a bad choice (well, unless it’s one that is against those 10 common sense rules, stated above) and depending on which one, will depend upon the Karma we will deal with in coping with it. However, making good choices vs making bad choices starts with learning to have good intent that runs parallel with it’s purpose.

The good news is, if our choices (doesn’t happen to turn out good), were made with good intent; we will be able to adjust the purpose to end-up parallel with the intent. *Example, we wanted a pet, choose to get one, the intent was to have a furry-friend, to have fun with, and to love and one that will love us back. Yet, the pet isn’t obedient, feels like too much of a responsibility, causes chaos, stress and unpleasantness.

So instead of the happy and pleasant outcome, the purpose is not seeming to run parallel with the intent. However, in taking the steps to learn tips and get advice on putting the pet and yourself upon a schedule, along with being patient with and understanding the pets feelings these efforts help . As well as, realizing what the pets needs are and making the efforts to make things right. From this, it will end-up with a successful purpose, which will now be parallel with the intent; which was to have a furry-friend, to have fun with and to love and one that will love us back.

In choosing and making good decisions, (in any situation) we must first research, evaluate and prepare ourselves for the true whole picture and responsibilities, not just the one imagined in our minds or to fill our time or the needs only felt in our hearts.

C . Star V.

UnClutter Yourself

 It seems as though if we have a lot of choices, it can get more difficult to choose the correct ones.  Yet, if we don’t have many choices, it seems as though we can end up making bad ones.

This all plays out, each day in our lives and we have to first grasp the concept that there really is no good or bad choice.. Well the results might end up good or bad in our opinion and of our thinking of what is good(right) or bad(wrong) to us; of course there is obviously the reality of right and wrong.

However, even though we all should have a good idea of what is actually ‘right and wrong’ (morally and legally), it may differ from each other since, we may not have been taught or learned in the same way . As there are different views and different opinions on what is good or bad . This can cause confusion as we use those aspects of good and bad before we make choice.

Subsequently, if we already live in a life with much chaos, clutter and distraction, we can be blindsided and easily steered into making choices that are not so good and that we may even regret.

All of us seem to live in a world of ‘have-to’s’ and ‘need-to’s’, meanwhile constantly trying to find a way of the ‘getting to’s’ with the ‘want-to’s’.

A good way to start setting up an atmosphere of creating a series of better choices and success is to start with uncluttering and re-organizing (some people call it regrouping) because doing this clears the mind, soul and space! The art of uncluttering, is not just limited to only material things we have around us, but also of the uncluttering of our minds. We all have different methods and ideas in doing so and again, there isn’t any good or bad way of doing it, but possibly a more efficient and successful way.

The 1st step could be to begin to get rid of excessive material things around ourselves and in our living space (at the least to go through, clean up, reorganize and put away or store), especially things that are just literally taking up space and not necessarily something that you will be readily using or needing for awhile. This will get you going in the right direction, then create (a go-to or place) for things ‘as a home to put items in where it goes’ and this also begins to help.

From there, we can begin to see some clarity, what’s really important to us, focusing on what we next need to in creating more actions that will begin to steer us in the right directions. All this will begin to help us achieve the things we want to, instead of spending time purchasing more things, collecting stuff we don’t need and spending time trying to keep things cleaned-up and less chaotic.

This will make it easy to figure out, more of what it is we really need.                 

One of the biggest dilemma’s I find in many people, is that they are constantly worried about not having something or not having enough of something. This is not only a common issue, but it is a very sensitive and personal one and it brings us into such a monumental cause in worrying, stressing- over and even hoarding. Yet, so much time and energy is spent purchasing, worrying, stressing-over and hoarding ; sadly most of ‘these things’ we won’t even ever use, many of the things will expire or go bad (by the time we use them) and other these things we will really, never need.

I suppose it all stems from the fear of not having or not being able to get them, but it would only seem logical to use the energy and time in doing something more positive, that will ensure you won’t have to fear about that anymore.. Such as surrounding yourself with positive, caring and loving people, making friends and groups to socialize with (maybe even to barter things with) and spend more time learning skills, having fun and enjoying your life, instead of worrying about things you may not have.

This may even include relocating yourself and moving to an area that’s accessible for things that you feel you’re going to need.       

Most importantly, nothing is guaranteed even if you were saving something or hoarding some things that you think you’re going to need or that you feel is going to save or help you in one way or another, it may not end up that way. Since by the time you need it, there might have to be another solution, in fact …one that you should’ve already been working on.

C .Star. V

Our Choices Have Value

“Our choices make up our world”

How do we learn right from wrong? How are we all suppose to know exactly what to do, when to do it, where to do it at and with whom? Our lives seem to bring us confusion, disappointment, hurt, pain, struggles and stress, as we figure it all out. Meanwhile, we wonder what we are here for in this world as we are trying to just survive.

There really is no one answer that fits it all, but we all need to understand just how important and monumental our choices in life can be and more importantly, is how we allow them to affect us.

Our lives start as infants, then toddlers, then pre-teens, teens, young adults, then older adults, as seniors and then as an elder. Our world has been filled with more and more people, this means more and more opinions, views and choices. Often we, misinterpret one another because of the lack of, ‘wanting to understand’ or care about one another’s feelings, struggles or needs.  Along with, living in a society that doesn’t realizes the need to teach our children coping and ‘every-day’ living skills. We then are left dealing with a society of adults, whom already don’t know how to cope well with every-day life, either.

We may be steered into a way of life that may not be realistic, nor have allowed us to have learned how to cope with the basics in life. Then, we may end-up being mistreated or misunderstood and with each passing day we may not be as grateful and happy as we could be.

We all continue to use our free-will to choose and do what we feel that we want to or can do. Yet, there’s so much more then just the physical aspect of our lives and what we can only see, that controls our outcomes and our choices. 

It is the energies put forth in our choices and decisions we make, that create our life and this, creates our world.  So, until we learn how to become more aware of the spiritual factors, we as humans will make our share of blunders, uh-oh’s and mistakes.

Yet, by finding solutions to educate ourselves so not to be misunderstood and in taking the responsibility of wrong choices, we can be creating good outcomes, regardless. Meanwhile, asking for forgiveness, forgiving ourselves and others and then moving on from whatever it is bothering us. This will give value to our lives.

Now that might sound a bit strange “To value our mistakes”, but after all those were our choices. In doing so, it will bring forth growth, strength and the ability to make better choices in our lives.

C .Star. V